Smiling Depression: Unmasking the Hidden Struggle

How are you, really ?

For someone with high- functioning depression, or 'smiling depression,' their answer may surprise you. Because, depression doesn't always have a look. So while someone may appear happy on the outside, their answer to this question may sound more like: "I'm struggling," "I feel alone," "I'm in a funk that I can't get out of," "I don't feel joy in anything that I do." It's not uncommon for people with smiling depression to work really hard to disguise their symptoms.

So what exactly is 'smiling' or high- functioning depression?

Typically, smiling depression occurs when individuals who are experiencing depression mask their symptoms. They hide behind a smile to convince other people that they are happy.

And because of this, this type of depression often goes unrecognized because when most people imagine depression, they think of someone who looks really sad or cries a lot. And while it's true that sadness and unexplained bouts of crying are common characteristics of depression, not everyone looks sad when they’re depressed.

It can be difficult to identify when someone is struggling with high-functioning depression, since the very nature of the condition is that they tend to minimize or hide their symptoms to the outside world. Here are some characteristics of high-functioning depression you might recognize in yourself or your loved ones:

• Feelings of persistent sadness or low mood

• Feeling tired all the time, no matter how much or how little sleep you get

• Feelings of low self-esteem and unworthiness

• Having to force yourself to engage in activities that you used to be interested in

• Difficulties focusing or concentrating on work or daily tasks

Why People Smile When They're Depressed

It's not uncommon for people to keep their depression private. From wanting to protect their privacy to fearing judgment by others, there are many personal and professional reasons why people hide their symptoms of depression and may mask it with a smile. Here's a closer look at why people keep depression a secret.

Fear of Burdening Others

Depression and guilt tend to go hand-in-hand. Many people don’t want to burden anyone else with their struggles. This fact may be especially true for people who are used to taking care of others rather than having others take care of them. They simply do not know how to ask for help, so they keep their struggles to themselves.

Embarrassment

Some people believe depression is a sign of weakness. They may even feel like they should be able to "snap out of it." When they cannot, they think there's something wrong with them. And because of this, they may feel embarrassed about feeling depressed because they think they should be able to handle it themselves.

Denial

Smiling depression may stem from a person’s denial that they feel depressed. They may think that as long as they’re smiling, they must not have depression. Many people cannot admit that there might be something wrong with them. It's easier for them to pretend like they're fine than it is to open up about how they truly feel.

Concern About Appearing Weak

People with smiling depression often fear that others will see them as weak and vulnerable. They are concerned that others will use their depression as leverage against them. So, they would rather put on a tough exterior than admit that they are struggling.

Guilt

Because guilt tends to accompany depression, sometimes people don’t feel as though they should be depressed. They might think they have a good life and shouldn’t feel bad. They also feel like they must be doing something wrong or that they're somehow to blame for being depressed. So they keep it hidden behind a smile.

Perfectionism

Perfectionists have often mastered the art of appearing perfect. And, for many, that means disguising any pain or struggles they are experiencing. To a perfectionist, admitting feeling depressed would mean that their lives are less than perfect and they just cannot bring themselves to feel that.

If you are experiencing symptoms of depression, but are hiding it from everyone else, you need to know that there is help and there is hope. You are not alone.

Take the first step and reach out for help. With the right treatment and support, the smile you have on the outside will soon match how you feel on the inside.