Reconnecting With Hope, Even When it Feels Really Difficult

If it’s really hard to feel hopeful right now, start by just acknowledging that.

“I feel hopeless”

Moving from overwhelming hopelessness to actually being able to articulate “I feel hopeless” is the beginning of self- awareness. Words are coordinates. Legitimate ones: Hopelessness is a place—a place where we temporarily land sometimes. Especially in hard times. But, it’s also a place where we can find ourselves again, and build a sense of trust and grace that maybe we haven’t had before.

Have you ever judged yourself for not being resiliently on your toes—sure-footed and feet forward like you usually are? That kind of silent judgment is one way we can really feel hopeless and lose trust within ourselves. It’s a feeling that everything around us feels difficult, and we’ve lost the trust in ourselves to be able to “handle it.”

Inner disorientation gets us frightened and out of sorts. Once we start to feel hopeless, we can lean into that too much, and start to feel like that’s our reality. But, just as easily—by having compassion for our experience--we can find ourselves again. It doesn’t take a huge change to the outside world to feel differently on the inside. Even in unprecedented times, we can feel hopeful.

Where do we find hope? In essence, it is within us.

Once we connect with that vulnerability of feeling lost and hopeless, paradoxically, we are no longer shut off from ourselves. Instead, we are available to be energized, motivated, mobilized, and inspired—the elements that sustain hope in the world.

Feeling hopeless and lost these days might not be what people are saying aloud, but it’s what many, many of us, may be feeling.

Here are some ways of responding to hopelessness to keep the channels clear to finding your way back to a place of compassion and hope:

1. Honor your feelings of hopelessness without being consumed by them. 

2. No judgment. Part of what bogs us down and sends us deeper into hopelessness can be our own inner critic. We can be compassionate with ourselves for why we have these responses. We aren’t judging ourselves for them, nor do we want to be locked in by them. These feelings are to be expected and are not a sign of your failure or weakness—you’re not not resilient, or doing life “wrong” because you don’t always feel hopeful. It is a step in the process, a dialogue or dynamic within us all, and the humanity of suffering and learning and growing from it.

3. Humble goals: Find little pivot activities. No act of hope is too small. Pivot to any action: Whether it’s getting up and brushing your teeth, watering the plants, putting on music, or connecting with someone you care about. We haven’t solved those unsolvable problems, but we are back on the road—there is hope in any action where we rejoin the flow of life.

4. Hope without proof. Do we need proof for the existence of hope? Not necessarily. Hope is momentum-forward trust in life and oneself, without the certificate guaranteeing “x will happen.” You can allow yourself to gently feel trust and hope.

   
   

Navigating hopelessness can be challenging at times, so reaching out for support may be key. The simple act of asking for support acknowledges the truth that we can’t do it alone. And we shouldn’t have to.

Therapy can be that support for you.

Beyond immediate problem-solving, therapy offers lifelong tools for personal growth and self-discovery. It teaches individuals how to cope with future challenges, improves self-awareness, and enhances emotional intelligence. Therapy is not just about finding hope; it’s about equipping oneself with the knowledge and skills to maintain that hope through life’s ups and downs.

If you are struggling and need immediate support, there is help. You are not alone.

Call, text, or chat the 988 Lifeline to connect with someone 24/7:

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